'Gossip Girl' series finale recap: Blogger revealed!

EARLIER: Gossip Girl has been a long, lovely, lascivious road — and it all comes to an end tonight.

After six seasons, the series that taught us about fashion, friends, and fake smiles will retire like an out-of-season handbag, but I beg you not to ruin your mascara with tears. (Also, tears are for the weak.) Instead, let us celebrate the morally reprehensible journey we’ve just taken and toast our frenemies from the Upper East Side.

I invite you to use this space to discuss the show’s series finale. At some point this evening — after your friendly Gossip recapper rediscovers the will to live in a world without the likes of Blair, Chuck, Serena, Dan…I guess Nate, too — this post will be updated to include a full recap of the action.

UPDATE: Recap below. -Xoxo

So Dan is Gossip Girl — now those are five words I never thought I’d write.

But I have to say, I highly approve of this choice. It’s edgy, daring, bold, and probably dripping in inconsistency — but that’s okay. I’m simply glad that it didn’t turn out to be an unknown person or peripheral character. The writers chose Gossip Girl straight from the heart of the gang — and that decision deserves some respect.

What also deserves props? This entire finale, which was a perfect balance of nostalgia, mythology, wit, trickery, and closure.

Also, now that I’ve had time to digest the finale, I’m very glad that a relatively small portion of the final hour was spent on wrapping up the season’s plot. We all know this wasn’t the final season we were hoping for, and I’m glad we didn’t spend too much time dwelling on Steven or Bart or the abomination that is Nate and Sage. Instead, we had some intimate quality time with Serena and Dan, who spent much of the hour flashing back to Dan’s Gossip Girl beginnings and their first meeting. I LOVED these flashbacks; they were so charming. And they were nice context for what came later: THEIR WEDDING.

In present day, we mostly followed the final steps of the Chuck and Blair saga. They struggled to make their wedding happen before Blair would be forced to testify against Chuck, who was a murder suspect. (She couldn’t be forced to testify against him if they were married.) So they made it happen in a rush — but, surprise, it was still gorgeous. Way to go, gang! Bonus: Their marriage succeeded in getting Chuck off the suspect list, and Bart’s death was ruled an accident.

Nate spent much of the episode trying to unmask Gossip Girl because it was the kind of big story that would save the Spectator. Unsurprisingly, Nate proved his journalistic prowess by… uncovering nothing. Thankfully, Dan handed him the story in the form of a final chapter, and saved his butt. (Bros forever!)

The news of Gossip Girl’s identity caused shock waves — and was the perfect opportunity to have a montage of “OMG! Gossip Girl has been revealed” cameos! New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Jessica Szohr’s Vanessa, Katie Cassidy’s Juliette, Willa Holland (Thea from Arrow), and, of course, Kristen Bell all made appearances. Bonus awesomeness? Bell made her cameo alongside Rachel Bilson in a scene that showed the two rehearsing for the movie version of Dan’s book. (Personal note: I screamed in joy!)

But even after Dan turned in his final chapter and revealed himself to be Gossip Girl, we still had one final chapter in our Gossip story, which took place five years in the future.

Revealed in this flashforward? Nate was considering running for mayor (for our sake, let’s hope they were talking about Foursquare), Blair and Chuck had a son named Henry (who looked more like Sebastian Stan than Ed Westwick), Blair’s fashion line was a huge success, Eric (Connor Paolo) finally gained the ability to grow facial hair, Rufus is dating Lisa Loeb (WTF moment of the series?), Lola and Olivia went on to star in the stage version of a book written by Ivy, Georgina may have ended up with Jack (ew), and, of course, Dan and Serena ended up together.

I’m blown away, gang! And also filled with some burning questions: What did you think of the Gossip Girl reveal? Loved or disappointed? Does the fact that Dan is Gossip Girl — and thus, technically chose the nickname Lonely Boy — somehow make the label even worse? It drips in teenage angst! Do you think there was a secret alternate ending that showed Blair spear fishing in a coconut bikini? Do you think “Chuck and Blair hold hands; Chuck and Blair go to the movies” are actually lines from Serena’s secret book about the gang? Are you going to miss the only show on TV that can use the line, “The good thing is we can do the same thing we did last time Bart died”? Did anyone else chuckle when Eric thanked his mother for her “wonderful parenting”? He was mocking her, right? And lastly, how would you grade the finale?

Additional note: If you have the time, check out the comments section. There’s some great discussion/reflection going on!

Read some recaps some from this season:

‘Gossip Girl’ recap: Beginning of the end

‘Gossip Girl’ recap: Dumping ground

‘Gossip Girl’ recap: Keeping it in the family