Sex And The City

Everything that Sex and the City taught us about sex and love

"I love you, but I love me more"
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Sex and the City is one of the most famous TV shows of all time. Sarah Jessica Parker's Carrie Bradshaw and co. made us laugh, weep and attempt to copy their every outfit across six seasons through the 1990s and 2000s.

As the beloved show is confirmed to be returning for a new 10-episode series, And Just Like That, we look back on the most important things it taught us about love, sex and relationships...

Your relationship with yourself is the most important one you'll ever have

Throughout its six seasons, Sex and the City always served as a reminder that loving yourself should always come first, and that your happiness should always be a priority.

Perhaps one of the most poignant reminders came when we saw Smith Jerrod and Samantha gradually fall in love, but it ended in one of the series' most devastating break-ups.

She said: "Yes, I love you – ah, fuck it, I’m just gonna say the thing you’re not supposed to say: I love you, but I love me more. And I’ve been in a relationship with myself for 49 years and that’s the one I need to work on."

Looks aren't everything

Despite it's many, many physically attractive characters, SATC reminded us that looks aren't everything when it comes to love, and that it's more important to fall for someone for who they are.

Harry wasn't exactly conventionally 'hot', and when he fell for Charlotte, she wasn't sure, telling the girls that she didn't think she could date someone with his looks.

But she did, and not only did she fall in love with him, it turned out to be the best sex of her life!

Sex isn't always great

Sex and the City was one of the first shows to pioneer honest, real-life sex – not just the sort of sex you see in movies.

From problems with getting it up to unusual fetishes and those who are just terrible lays, the sex in SATC showed viewers that IRL sex can be messy, complicated, awkward as hell and just a bit shit. And that's cool because it happens to everyone. We've all been there huns.

Female sexual liberation should be celebrated, not shamed

Samantha Jones is to female pleasure what Emmeline Pankhurst was to women's democratic freedom.

Okay, perhaps that was a bit much. But you get where we're coming from.

Samantha burst onto our screens with vigour and confidence – she was proud of her sexuality, valued her pleasure and was never afraid to ask for what she wanted. At a time when such things were still kept rather 'hush hush', this showed viewers that women's pleasure was something to be celebrated.

But it also taught us that society still has a problem with sexually liberal women. Throughout the show, Samantha is judged for her love of sex – both from outside characters and the other women. But in her true IDGAF attitude, Samantha shut them down.

“I will not be judged by you or society," she says. "I will wear whatever, and blow whomever I want, as long as I can breathe and kneel."

We want that quote framed and hanging on our wall.

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Everyone's happy ending looks different

Minds out the gutter, people.

All of the SATC women wanted different things out of life and out of love – for Carrie, it was that big (excuse the pun) movie-style love; while that was far from Samantha's ideal – and it showed us that whatever your goals and ambitions are, as long as you're being true to yourself, that's okay.

Always. Use. Protection

Having a one night stand with a lazy ovary and one ball? You can still get pregnant. Miranda will tell you that.

Dating is exhaustiiiiiiing

Charlotte said it best: "I’ve been dating since I was fifteen, I’m exhausted! Where is he?!"

We felt that.

Over six series, the gang dated over 100 men between them. And some of them – okay, most of them – are going to suck. The show reminds us that you're going to go on some shitty dates with some shitty people – and that's okay. As the saying goes, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs, and from each frog we learn a little bit more about we want and need. Or something like that.

Remember when Jack broke up with Carrie via post-it? Or Brad licking Charlotte's face? Or the cheating scum that was Richard? Or when Keith showed Carrie around his apartment that wasn't actually his?

Yep, dating and relationships can be a total minefield. But that leads us nicely to our final point, and perhaps the most important thing SATC showed us...

Friends are the great loves of our lives

Above all else, Sex and the City was a story on the importance of female friendship. Whenever one of them fell, the others were there to help pick up the pieces.

Supporting each other through bereavement, fertility struggles, pregnancy, parenthood, financial struggles, health scares, and of course heartbreak.

As Big says: "You girls are the loves of her life. A guy is lucky to come in fourth."