The Simpsons (TV Series)

Lisa's Rival (1994)

Yeardley Smith: Lisa Simpson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Professor Taylor : Hi Lisa. I'm Alison's father, Professor Taylor. I've heard great things about you.

  Lisa : Oh really? I...

  Professor Taylor : Oh, don't be modest. I'm glad we have someone who can join us in our anagram game.

  Alison Taylor : We take proper names and rearrange the letters to form a description of that person.

  Professor Taylor : Like, er... oh, I don't know, uh... Alec Guinness.

  Alison Taylor : [thinking]  Genuine class.

  Professor Taylor : Ho ho, very good. Alright Lisa, um... Jeremy Irons.

  Lisa : [looks worried]  Jeremy's... iron.

  Professor Taylor : Mm hmm, well, that's... very good... for a first try. You know what? I have a ball. Perhaps you'd like to bounce it?

• Lisa : [Lisa turns a fan on to demonstrate a snow storm over her complete diarama. It promptly tilts, then blows out the window]  Is it okay?

  Bart Simpson : [looks out the window, then turns back to Lisa]  The important thing is that we survived.

• [Lisa fears a new girl in school is more talented than she] 

  Marge : Believe me, honey. She's more scared of you than you are of her.

  Lisa : You're thinking of bears, mom.

• Bart : [after her diorama blows out the window, Lisa is sure she will lose to Alison unless she does something. Consoling her, Bart draws up a plan]  Tomorrow morning when Alison steps out of her house, we spray her with the hose, soaking her head to foot, well leaving us relatively dry.

  Lisa : Relatively?

  Bart : Well, there's bound to be some splash back.

  Lisa : Bart, her being wet isn't going to help me win the contest!

  Bart : [slyly]  Well, we could sabotage her diorama, making her look bad in front of the entire school.

  Lisa : [positively gleeful]  Perfect!

  Bart : And leaving her with the most dramatic soaking of her life!

  Lisa : Enough with the hose!